Create The Caption #318

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

(Usually) Everyday I'll throw out a photo, you provide the caption, and then hilarity ensues. I'm also adding a handful of links at the bottom of the page that you should check out each day.

Yesterday's Winners....


"Mr. Rosenhaus, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."- Walnuts

(That one might be replacing "I'm So Excited" as my favorite)

"Will Plaxico Berries have to go through a rite of patches in order to be play again in the NFL?"- JFein

"TK: Drew, we see the story of Plax and the gun and the club, and here is what America wants to know. Brett Favre is an avid hunter and a good marksman. Why didn't Plaxico consult with Brett Favre? Why did he not take shooting lessons from Brett Favre? Perhaps he consulted with Aaron Rodgers and Rodgers, while giving him good advice, could not give him the same level of expertise as Brett Favre could."- Dallas

"Next caption, please."- Sal

....as you wish....
_______________________________________

Are you funny enough to create a caption for this photo of Eli Manning walking into Giants Stadium this morning?


Daily Links:

SI Photoshops Phelps' Head (With Leather)
WaPo Still Loves Our Pammy! (Washington Post)
Caron Butler Is A Vanessa Carlton Fan? (First Cuts)
A New Idea For The Pro Bowl (Randball)
How Little Charlie Kept His Job (Simon on Sports)
Kiffin's Wife Has Some New Fans (HHR)
More ESPN Reports Chicanery (Wiz of Odds)
Don't Go Wandering Into Brandon Jacobs' House (Fanhouse)

Posted by Awful Announcing- at 1:02 PM

79 Comments:

Dude, I do NOT look like Michael Phelps. If I do, then you look like Herman Munster, you jerk.

hollywood wags said...
Dec 3, 2008, 1:29:00 PM  

Yeah, this is Eli Manning just calling to remind you that I'm still UNSTOPPABLE!!!

GMoney said...
Dec 3, 2008, 1:30:00 PM  

I'm not tryin to be a Dick but the Billy Madison quote though funny may be jumping the shark

W_Rabb said...
Dec 3, 2008, 1:30:00 PM  

"Yeah Mom, I remembered to thank my offensive line today."

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 1:31:00 PM  

"Hi. Is this Hannah Montana? Really? Hi, Hannah. My name is Eli, and I'm your biggest fan..."

foos said...
Dec 3, 2008, 1:31:00 PM  

Yeah No I prefer to stash my gun in a Pair a Wranglers vs Sweat pants it tend to be more secure

W_Rabb said...
Dec 3, 2008, 1:32:00 PM  

"Oh come on mom. Please, please, please! Can I stay at Kevin Boss' house tonight? Pllleeaaassseeee!"

foos said...
Dec 3, 2008, 1:33:00 PM  

Yes, Mom, Plaxico wasn't playing nice so I left and watched Terms of Endearment with Peyton. It was fun!

Brad James said...
Dec 3, 2008, 1:34:00 PM  

IM THE MOTHAFUCKIN BEST

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 1:35:00 PM  

" No mom, the gun is in the OTHER pocket "

MarcRabbi said...
Dec 3, 2008, 1:35:00 PM  

Eli caught on the phone with Elisha Cuthbert, tying to set up a sloppy seconds for himself.

walnuts said...
Dec 3, 2008, 1:59:00 PM  

Put your left hand in...take your left hand out...put your left hand in...and you shake it all about...

JTATC said...
Dec 3, 2008, 2:04:00 PM  

Why yes, my refrigerator is running. Why do you ask?

Jay said...
Dec 3, 2008, 2:07:00 PM  

"... and that's why I don't eat shrimp!"

Birdman said...
Dec 3, 2008, 2:10:00 PM  

"No, I got it the first time. Yeah, I know, 'shotgun formation'. I get it. I know, it's a football term, and also my WR shot himself. With a gun. No, you're abolutely the first one to make that connection, I appreciate you calling me. Look, you're breaking up on me, I'm going to hang up now..."

Down Goes Brown said...
Dec 3, 2008, 2:19:00 PM  

Wait. So, you shot yourself? How the hell?!? You know what, I don't have time for this, I have another Citizen Eco-Drive commercial to shoot.

Jesse said...
Dec 3, 2008, 2:25:00 PM  

Yes Dad I am talking with the phone in my left hand to rest my arm. (rolls eyes)

The Mask said...
Dec 3, 2008, 2:28:00 PM  

Yes, the Plax story is true.......and I am serious, but dont call me Shirley.

Richard said...
Dec 3, 2008, 2:30:00 PM  

Yup...I totally framed him. Yup, Marvin Harrison too. Watch your back Peyton, Im like the Keyser Sose of this football shit.

matt said...
Dec 3, 2008, 2:33:00 PM  

"Who is this? Plaxico??

Now who wishes he showed up for workouts in NY?

And remember for next time...you only get 1 phone call..why'd you waste it calling me?

Mack said...
Dec 3, 2008, 2:39:00 PM  

"What do you mean there can be a tie in the Double Stuff Racing League??? I never knew that! Why can't you just open a new package and keep going???"

Mikvogel said...
Dec 3, 2008, 2:40:00 PM  

Hey buddy, how's the thigh doing? Do you need me to come over and rub some lotion on it? Will htat make it feel better?

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 2:43:00 PM  
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dec 3, 2008, 2:45:00 PM  

Wait, wait, wait...you can save me how much over my current log distance carrier?

MarkMc said...
Dec 3, 2008, 2:47:00 PM  

Eli: "So what did Sean Avery say about my ex-girlfriend?"

49er16 said...
Dec 3, 2008, 2:52:00 PM  

Peyton, what are you talking about?? An ornithological event???... Oh goddamnit, not again! I DON'T CARE IF THE BIRD IS THE WORD!

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 2:54:00 PM  

"...ok I'm at the stadium now, I have to go, bye....you didn't hang up either! ...no you hang up...you hang up, ok, I'm going to hang up now...ahhhhh you didn't hang up either...ok...ok...bye bye Pey Pey."

the great bambi said...
Dec 3, 2008, 3:01:00 PM  

After finally pulling Eric Mangini's razor phone out of the back of the SUV, Eli Manning is annointed King of the Meadowlands!

Wade Robertson said...
Dec 3, 2008, 3:05:00 PM  

Eli: MY PICTURE IS ON AWFUL ANNOUNCING?!?! CAN'T WE SEND A CEASE & DESIST ORDER OR SOMETHING?

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 3:09:00 PM  

Hey brother! Can you believe I'm on my way to possibly winning my second Super Bowl? And in a row, too! How about that!

How long did it take you, again?

Santa Claustrophobia said...
Dec 3, 2008, 3:18:00 PM  

Eli on the phone with Peyton...

Peyton: I can't believe that about Plaxico...
Eli: I know..
Peyton: It just doesn't make any sen....
*BEEP, BOOP, BEEP*
Peyton: Eli, you already dialed...
Eli: opps
Peyton: so anyway, you have to make sure your saying all the right things, like being a good teammate and all that st...
*BEEP, BOOP, BEEP*
Peyton: mmmmmmm...

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 3:20:00 PM  
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dec 3, 2008, 3:33:00 PM  

No dad, I'm dead serious, THE L.L. Bean! They want me to be their spokesman! They just sent me all this neat-o stuff like a beige collared sweatshirt, this is the way better than the Citizen sponsorship.

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 3:43:00 PM  

I thought the expression was "he shot himself in the foot"?

Wait what you mean he actually shot himself in the leg?

In the spirit of Earth Wind and Fire I must say that he funked himself up there...

Alex said...
Dec 3, 2008, 3:46:00 PM  

Call me sir God Dammit!

Joseph said...
Dec 3, 2008, 3:48:00 PM  

"No, mom. I'm not rejoining the Double Stuff Racing League."

I Worship Erin Andrews said...
Dec 3, 2008, 3:49:00 PM  

Hey bro, i just bought a sweet PSP. It's in my pocket.

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 4:00:00 PM  

Eli-"I want a hamburger... no, a cheeseburger. I want a hot dog. I want a milkshake"

Archie on the other end-"You'll get nothing, and like it."

Abe said...
Dec 3, 2008, 4:13:00 PM  

Some people will do anything to get out of facing Brian Dawkins.

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 4:15:00 PM  

Eliminating Tiki: 1 Failing primadonna TV Host

Eliminating Shockey: 1 Unproductive loudmouth traded and sinking another team

Eliminating Plax: 1 Self Inflicted Gunshot Wound

Selling your soul to the Devil to complete his master plan: Priceless

Watch out Lawrence Tynes, you may be next!

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 4:45:00 PM  

Layla Kiffin? Hey I'm Peyton's little bro, he said I could ask you for a favor since Lane owes him one....Lemme Know

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 4:47:00 PM  

Eli Manning is....UNSTOPPABLE!!!

not so funny any more, is it?

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 4:49:00 PM  

Who's Dion Phaneuf and why won't he stop calling me?

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 4:55:00 PM  

"No, Plax, I don't have a game check you can borrow. What do you mean it's urgent? I don't care that Michael and Charles are over, I'm not giving you money to go to Vegas with a gunshot wound in your leg."

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 4:58:00 PM  

Yeah girl he really did shoot his self. No he ain't single!

juju said...
Dec 3, 2008, 5:23:00 PM  

Eli: "Coach, I read in the paper this morning that we clinch a playoff spot if we tie this week..."

Coughlin: "Shhh, don't let the Eagles know our gameplan."

yanksfan12 said...
Dec 3, 2008, 5:30:00 PM  

Daaaaad, you promised that I would be SI Sportsman of the Year and not that assclown Micheal Phelps. Don't they realize I am the Super Bowl MVP? This is so unfair.

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 5:54:00 PM  

Eli doing a Motorola commercial: Yo, Peyton, where you at?

JFein said...
Dec 3, 2008, 5:54:00 PM  

Eli: Peyton, I love you, but what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul. Andy Reid is way over 375 pounds, you twatwaffle.

JFein said...
Dec 3, 2008, 5:58:00 PM  

Dude, where's my car?

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 6:03:00 PM  

I think that line has officially from Billy Madison jumped the shark.

walnuts said...
Dec 3, 2008, 6:04:00 PM  

opps,I wrote that wrong. Let me rephrase that: I think that line from Billy Madison has offiially jumped the shark.

walnuts said...
Dec 3, 2008, 6:06:00 PM  

Eli: So how do I get Peyton back?

Detective Jimmy Shaker: Are you going to pay me?

Eli: Of course I am.

Detective Jimmy Shaker: Then it shouldn't be a problem.

Mike from chicago said...
Dec 3, 2008, 6:11:00 PM  

"So like I got this job like being the thrower for this footbaaalll team. . .I know totallly, right?. . . And now like, this guy with like a really weird name and is supposed to catch the ball just shot himself. OMG, I knowwww. Suck a dumb jock."

Mike R said...
Dec 3, 2008, 6:17:00 PM  

Such*

Mike R said...
Dec 3, 2008, 6:18:00 PM  

Peyton, it IS on like Donkey Kong!

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 6:31:00 PM  

Idk, my bff Plaxico

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 6:46:00 PM  

"Movie quote"

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 7:09:00 PM  

"I dont know if I can make it. I might have something to do the first Sunday in February."

jg said...
Dec 3, 2008, 7:21:00 PM  
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sean H said...
Dec 3, 2008, 7:47:00 PM  

Listen, Peyton heard how I got rid of Plaxico, now he wants to do the same thing to Marvin. So, hey, listen, I want somebody good - and I mean very good - to plant that gun. I don't want my brother coming out of that toilet with just his dick in his hands, alright?

Sean H said...
Dec 3, 2008, 7:47:00 PM  

Eli: Hello? Oh hi Tee Martin, get me a large pepperoni with some breadsticks and a soda?

SSReporters said...
Dec 3, 2008, 8:44:00 PM  

"I absolutely will not accept a collect call from Harris Smith."

Jim said...
Dec 3, 2008, 9:05:00 PM  

I know Peyton...at least your star wide receiver was smart enough to get rid of the gun!!

Scott Shields said...
Dec 3, 2008, 9:14:00 PM  

Hi Cooper, I know you are not the "Black Sheep" of the family. Tell Daddy I am coming home for Christmas and tell Mom to make my bed.

49er16 said...
Dec 3, 2008, 9:46:00 PM  

I didn't want to ride the team bus anyway.

Anonymous said...
Dec 3, 2008, 11:05:00 PM  

Peyton on the other end: So Eli, how do you feel about facing Jim Johnson's blitzes on Sunday?

Eli: I'm so excited. I'M SO EXCITED! I'm so.....so scared.

JFein said...
Dec 3, 2008, 11:50:00 PM  

What do mean I got a dorky new haircut? The "Flock of Seagulls" look is coming back soon. Hey! My mom said I was the coolest QB in the locker room.

Dec 4, 2008, 12:13:00 AM  

Tiki... STOP CALLING ME!

Anonymous said...
Dec 4, 2008, 12:30:00 AM  

Yes! I can hear you now.
I'm going to take a couple steps and then ask me again, ok?

Anonymous said...
Dec 4, 2008, 1:19:00 AM  

Howard Stern called and wanted to do an interview about my sex life?
I didn't think we could have sex this soon into a marriage.
Bradshaw said we have to wait 3-years!

Anonymous said...
Dec 4, 2008, 1:21:00 AM  

"Mr. Salisbury, I would prefer it if you didn't send me any more picture messages of your penis."

-Zack said...
Dec 4, 2008, 1:58:00 AM  

Eli: "Awww Dad, what do you mean you are giving the company to Peyton?! Did the penguin put you up to this???"

Archie (on the other end): "Penguin?!?!"

Nate said...
Dec 4, 2008, 8:34:00 AM  

No, Tony. Just because I am a quarterback in New York, doesn't mean I can get you a pair of Brett Farve's underwear.

Anonymous said...
Dec 4, 2008, 8:47:00 AM  

Move my reinforcements from Madagascar to South Africa and then don't touch the board until I get home!

The Godfather said...
Dec 4, 2008, 9:28:00 AM  

Can you hear me now?...Good

Anonymous said...
Dec 4, 2008, 10:52:00 AM  

Uh, yes, I'm looking for a friend of mine. Last name Jass. First name Hugh.

Kirk said...
Dec 4, 2008, 11:17:00 AM  

Phone: "This is Tiki Barber. I'm busy preparing for some stellar analysis, so please leave a message at the beep. (BEEP)"

Eli: "Hey Tiki. This is my daily call to tell you to SUCK IT!!! I've got Super Bowl ring and all you've got is a job carrying Ann Curry's tampon bag. Have a great day."

MMayes said...
Dec 4, 2008, 11:55:00 AM  

"Hey, Eli, what's up? How's Indy treating you? No, no, they still haven't figured out that brain switch we did before the season. Tell Dad I said hi. Later."

Jason said...
Dec 4, 2008, 12:07:00 PM  

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