Sunday, October 12, 2008
We start the second half with a shot of Coach Hobo and his latest selection as Queen of the Hobos, shot at the NBA Finals earlier this year. Pats start at the 21 with a pass to Sammy Morris for three or four. Another pass goes to Morris, goes for a first down. Cassel gets to the 45, rushing it himself -- near the first down marker. Moss gets his second catch of the day for 15 yards and crosses midfield.
Next pass to WELKAH for eight yards. 2nd and 2 is a bomb aimed at Moss for the end zone, but it's short. Cassel runs and slides to the 28 for the first down. Cassel, facing the blitz on first, tosses a short out to Sammy Morris, who evades two tacklers and gets all the way to the Bolts' 2 yard line. Cassel has to throw 1st down away, as no one's open. Morris gets nailed in the back on 2nd down. 3rd down pass is incomplete, too, and they're going for it -- and that was awkward looking, as Cassel tries to run it himself and gets stopped.
Do you think Coach Hobo and Tom go on double dates? - 49er16
Not after that awkward date-swapping incident.
"So that is where Cindy was this summer." - John McCain - JG
"Erin Andrews in 25 years." - Anon
You take that back!
Tolbert gets the first carry and goes to the 5. Rivers floats another rainbow to Vincent Jackson, who gets all the way to the NE 35. After a couple plays, he airs it out to Jackson again in the end zone, and we're gonna get a PI flag on Ellis Hobbs. First and goal at the 1 yard line. Rivers to Gates, and it's a San Diego touchdown!
Kick is good, 24-3, Chargers.
"The big space-eater Jamal Williams." - Al
"He was doing more than eating space, he was taking the red right off the Patriots' helmets." - John
"You can put lipstick on a helmet, but it's still a helmet." - Al
Quentin Jammer picks off a pass thrown over Wes Welker's head. We may now be entering blowout territory (if we weren't already.)
Not that I mind, but the NBC cameramen seem very dedicated to shots of the Charger Girls' decolletage tonight. - PM
It's more attractive than some of the football being played. Sproles goes down to the Pats' 26 on a rush, but apparently it was 3rd and 10 anyway. The next play is a catch, and here comes the FG team on 4th down, and the crowd is booing when he sends Kaeding on up 21. Kaeding's kick is good, 27-3, San Diego.
Al, San Diego did NOT trade Michael Turner to Atlanta, he left in free agency.
Brandon Siler just mashed the kick returner. "Slater is looking like he got hit by a truck with Brandon Siler on the license plate." - Al
Cassel's pass gets batted down, and they're going back to his Little League World Series highlights. 2nd and 10 is to Faulk and he gets flipped by Eric Weddle. 3rd down is too short a pass to Jabar Gaffney, and here comes the punter again. Chris "Dateline NBC" Hansen boots it away from Sproles, the Chargers will have it at the 18.
"That's his reputation, a very classy, intelligent guy." - Al on Rodney Harrison. What? All I hear about half the time is how players think Harrison's a dirty player.
Rivers hits Gates past the 40 for a first down. Sproles runs outside for nothing. Flag on the next deep throw, and it's on Deltha O'Neal for illegal contact. LDT breaks one and runs for the Pats' 27 yard line. End of the 3rd. You mean I've got one more quarter of this blowout to go?
NBC needs to show a continuous picture in picture of Darth Hoodie b/c he must be fuming. - Anon
We should have started a Charger Girl view count. Not that I mind or anything, but the producer really likes those cheerleaders. - another Anon
Watch for it this quarter, because there's not gonna be a lot of reason to shoot the game. LDT to the 14 yard line. Hobbs tackles Tomlinson after one, LDT then gets a couple more, and now they're reviewing the Chargers' hard luck. (As a Broncos fan, I'm kind of tired of watching that sort of montage.) 3rd and 7 has Rivers scrambling and throwing it out of bounds -- but the flag is for a face mask on the Pats. 1st and goal. LDT up to the 5 on 2nd down. Fade off of Floyd's fingers, Kaeding will kick again. 23 yard figgie is good, 30-3, Chargers.
Slater takes the kick out to the 30.
Is Seattle really soaring into any game at 1-5? I think not. Faulk rushes for a first down. Cassel throws a short pass that bounces off his target, and was almost picked by Jammer. Norv wants to challenge it. Why, I'm not sure. Even if it was picked, Jammer fumbled and lost it.
You can't celebrate a tackle when your team is down by 24 points. - Anon
Agreed. And of course, Norv loses the challenge because it was obvious that Jammer didn't control it at all.
The clock operator can't hear the ref because the Charger fans are booing so damn loudly. A thumbs up to the dude in the luchador mask -- and we've got the chants of "BULLSHIT."
"It's a good boo night; there's a full moon. Somewhere in life you just need to get your booing." - John
Cassel throws the ball to the ground on 2nd, then calls time out.
"It's a two-minute boo!" - Al
You just knew we couldn't go a whole 60 minutes without NORV doing something so pointless. - SSReporters
This is why the Chargers will lose in the playoffs again this year. Norv will blow a challenge on something stupid, and he won't be able to challenge an important call later. Actually, I think that happened to him at least once last year.
"It's partially the Hochuli thing and the other booze, not spelled b-o-o-s." - Al
3rd and 15 goes to Ben Watson for a first, but it's negated thanks to offensive holding. 3rd and 25 is dropped by Welkah.
Please tell me someone has copious screencaps of Belichick tonight. - Dan
It's all the same emotionless expression and grumbling face, anyway. Punt goes out of bounds at midfield. Took 'em long enough to play the "San Diego Super-Chargers" song. That tune kicks ass.
"I wonder if one of my assistants are getting footage of the Chargers assistants hand signals."-Coach Hobo - 49er16
Coach Hobo: "If that assistant didn't get footage of the Chargers cheerleaders, he's getting fired."
"I hear that they are still so angry that they won't let zebras in the San Diego Zoo." - Al (via 49er16)
Jacob Hester just gave us San Diego's first screw-up of the day by fumbling. Pats ball at the SD 46. Even when Norv is winning he looks like a loser. Moss comes back for a short catch to the 31. Faulk is able to "squirt through a hole", in Al's words, to the 22. John sounds like a life coach, urging the Patriots to "make this a positive experience." Faulk runs to the 9, and another first down for him on the next carry. 1st and goal. Cassel runs to the 2.
Sammy Morris heads into the end zone from 2 yards out. Kick is up and good, 30-10, Chargers.
"They want blood." - Al on the fans booing again.
More lovely shots of Charger Girl decolletage before the kickoff, which Cletus Gordon runs back up to the 24.
I came to watch an NFL game but apparently NBC substituted it with soft porn. - SSReporters
It's better than the snuff film this game turned into a quarter ago.
"He's got seven screws and a wire going through his foot -- must be fun at an airport..." - Andrea Kremer
LDT rushes out for a bunch more after getting a screen pass.
"Bill Belichick's getting a headache." - John
I will never, ever get used to a Morrissey song being used to promote the NFL Network. Ever. It feels wrong.
Has John always been this amazed with punters, or has he been hitting the turducken too hard? - Dan
It's one of those things that former coaches like to make a big deal about, to tell you that every position matters. Cassel throws to Welker for a first down after SD punts it. Cassel to Faulk for 20 more into SD territory, as John talks about the Big Space Eater, Jamal Williams.
"He's kind of like Ralph Nader; you don't see Nader in the polls either." - Al, explaining why Williams isn't on the top players poll. BenJarvus Green-Ellis catches the pass from Cassel, and NE is taking a time out with two seconds left. That is pure Coach Hobo, being a prick.
Game over, Chargers win, 30-10. See you next week. Pray for the ALCS to go seven, so I live-blog that instead of Seahawks-Bucs.