The Pam Ward Chronicles Week 12

Saturday, November 17, 2007


Welcome back to our weekly installment of The Pam Ward Chronicles. I'm going to be keeping track of the Announcing Quotes throughout the day and I ask that you join in. Please leave any that you come across in the comments or feel free to email me at AwfulAnnouncing@Gmail.com.

I'll be back around noon, so if anything exciting happens during Gameday let me know, and I'll go back an grab some pics. See you then for the Game of they Year! Go Blue!!!

Your College Football Announcing Schedule: Week Twelve
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Okay....here we go folks. It's cold, it's rainy, and that's Football Weather my friends. 30 minutes until game time!

Okay...Desmond Howard as a Old West Sheriff? Right.

"It reminds of how rappers would peddle their demos to artists...to some sort of publishing company."- Desmond Howard on Kansas QB Todd Reesing making a highlight tape to get a scholarship.

A 5'10" white QB handing out his "mix tape"....good analogy. Gameday also looks to be having some Monday Night Countdown audio problems with people being placed all throughout the Big House.


How much do you think the OSU and Michigan Bands hate playing each other's fight songs before the game?

"Northwestern, 7-0." Andre Ware after Rashard Mendenhall scores for Illinois. (Via S2N)

"Lets see if I can get this one right Pam."- Ray Bentley
"That will be a first".- Pam Ward
(Via Steve)

Oooooh a lover's quarrel!

"Keep you eyes on Chad Henne. His first two throws were erratic for a quarterback known for his accuracy."- Kirk Herbstreit

Really? I would think "accuracy" and "Henne" were antonyms. I can't wait until he graduates....I don't care if I'm jinxing him right now or not.

"These players are really getting a feel for the field as they're playing this Football game."Kirk Herbstreit

Really? Isn't that how it usually works?

Herby just referred to Chad Henne as "Chenny." (Via Kyle)

He's like Chessie....the Lock Ness Monster of the Chesapeake Bay. Okay sorry...that analogy was "Desmond Like". Sweet OSU Starter jacket in the crowd....what is this 1994?

"Is three years really enough time to judge if he's the right guy"- Pam Ward on 'Cuse Greg Robinson (Ummm - Pam, he's won 7 games in 3 years, Via Russianator)

Come on Russ...that's 2.333333 wins per year!

Erin Andrews
just referred to "Gary Walker's passing" as the reason Fitzgerald became Northwestern's head coach. (Via Jim)

Hahahaha....isn't it Randy?

"The conditions are the virus affecting the computer that Jim Tressel puts in about taking care of the football." - Kirk Herbstreit after Todd Boeckman fumbles again.

That's just a horrible analogy.

An actual good call by Brent as Michigan was playing off of Robiske, and Boeckman hit him on the next play with a 6-yard out.

Dave Pasch just mentioned that Brandon Roberson (northwestern) was replaced by Tyrell Sutton as the starter two years ago and "hasn't gotten a carry since then." Roberson has had 74 carries this season, and possibly even a start. (Via Anon)

"They run the Quarterback draw like John Elway!"- Brent Musburger on Todd Boeckmam near the goal line

The "Boom" count for Herbie is up to 8.

"One more look at Mighty Mice....Fierce!"- Brent Musburger on Mike Hart

Pretty sure that nickname isn't supposed to be plural BM.

"Ahh, rivals, they spend a lot of time painting themselves up and undressing"- Brent Musburger (Via Smitty)

Yeah...Fall Out Boy coming back from the half. Thnks Fr Th Mmrs.

Lisa, we get it....it's raining. You don't have to ask both coaches how the weather is affecting the play of the game. And tone down all that energy....you look real happy to be at one of the biggest games of the year.


I know how you feel random guy behind the guy in the foreground. F'ing Beanie Wells. Could there be a worse nickname in Sports?

"Just a few minutes from Pasadena ahead 14-3."- Brent Musburger

1) There's 10 minutes left in the game.
2) That translates to about another hour of television.
3) Yes, I'm a bit bitter....I'm taking a shot now to calm down.

Well now that that's over with.....GO DUKE! (Never thought I would ever say that)

"This is a pass play when you call it in the huddle and how it chains........ges. Is like this."- Gary Danielson

"If he would have slowed down and put his butt to Jackson."- Gary Danielson

"I don't know many Big Ten QB's who can hit these types of balls"- David Norrie (Via Anon)

"Oklahoma stiffens when you get down in that red zone"- Brad Nessler (Hollywood Wags)

"He may be listed as offensive coordinator for Texas Tech, but saying Mike Leach has an offensive coordinator is like saying, I don't know, Rachael Ray has a private chef." - Brad Nessler (Via S2N

Posted by Awful Announcing- at 8:16 AM

76 Comments:

Go Buckeyes!

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 10:03:00 AM  

go duke!

Sam said...
Nov 17, 2007, 10:40:00 AM  

i'm sorry, but what the hell is herbstreit wearing?

matt said...
Nov 17, 2007, 10:55:00 AM  

matt you talking about the hat? He had that on last night too. I'm unsure of the actual name for it but I believe they're Irish, Scottish or English in decent.

Steve said...
Nov 17, 2007, 11:31:00 AM  

Herbie looks like a newsboy. Is he delivering the Columbus Dispatch today?

Nov 17, 2007, 11:31:00 AM  

does desmond EVER prepare? i'd say "do homework" but he was an athlete. ask him one question and he gets all flustered with no fact and just blah talk.

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 11:41:00 AM  

UM must hate it because OSU plays it better

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 11:57:00 AM  

Holy shit, ESPN had Mike Tirico do the 'Cuse starting lineups complete with orange hat.

Steve said...
Nov 17, 2007, 12:07:00 PM  

Is it me or does ESPN's Rob Simmelkjaer remind you of a bad Mad TV sketch staring Phil LaMar?

Steve said...
Nov 17, 2007, 12:12:00 PM  

"Northwestern, 7-0." Andre Ware, after Rashard Mendenhall scores for Illinois.

Signal to Noise said...
Nov 17, 2007, 12:14:00 PM  

Ray Bentley: "lets see if I can get this one right Pam".

Pam Ward: "That will be a first".

They were discussing a replay challenge of a catch. Bentley said he was out, replay showed he was in.

Steve said...
Nov 17, 2007, 12:15:00 PM  

Ok, with all the athletes who went to tOSU, they have to get Lebron James to introduce the Buckeyes? Really?

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 12:17:00 PM  

There are only so many games I can watch to catch Pam and Ray screwing up. Syracuse-UConn is not one of them.

anon - no kidding. I know Greg Oden's not doing much this year.

Signal to Noise said...
Nov 17, 2007, 12:21:00 PM  

Good point Anon....I guess Bobby Hoying wasn't available.

Nov 17, 2007, 12:23:00 PM  

As a syracuse fan, the only thing that could make this season more brutal - pam ward. May she and greg robinson take a slow boat to no where together

Russianator said...
Nov 17, 2007, 12:24:00 PM  

Herby just referred to Chad Henne as "Chenny."

Kyle said...
Nov 17, 2007, 12:26:00 PM  

Pam Ward: Is three years really enough time to judge if he's the right guy

Ummm - Pam, he's won 7 games in 3 years

Russianator said...
Nov 17, 2007, 12:33:00 PM  

Erin Andrews just referred to "Gary Walker's passing" as the reason Fitzgerald became Northwestern's head coach.

Jim said...
Nov 17, 2007, 12:46:00 PM  

actually it is 0-3 UM

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 12:49:00 PM  

"The conditions are the virus affecting the computer that Jim Tressel puts in about taking care of the football." - Herbie, after Todd Boeckman fumbles again.

The penalty for a bad metaphor should be two minutes with your mic shut off.

Signal to Noise said...
Nov 17, 2007, 12:50:00 PM  

I concur....that was just dumb.

Nov 17, 2007, 12:54:00 PM  

dave pasch just mentioned that brandon roberson (northwestern) was replaced by tyrell sutton as the starter two years ago and "hasn't gotten a carry since then." Roberson has had 74 carries this season, and possibly even a start.

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 12:58:00 PM  

Herbie's word of the day: BOOM.

3rd time in the last 5 minutes that I've heard it...

Kyle said...
Nov 17, 2007, 1:01:00 PM  

Herbstreit actually talked with John Madden for 7 hours last night.

Mookie said...
Nov 17, 2007, 1:03:00 PM  

Musberger just said 'ahh, rivals, they spend a lot of time painting themselves up and undressing'. Ok then...

Smitty Lite said...
Nov 17, 2007, 1:07:00 PM  

Another BOOM! for Herbie.

Mookie said...
Nov 17, 2007, 1:07:00 PM  

If Herbstreit analyzed the TO called by Henne:

Now watch the right hand, BOOM!!! It collides with the perpendicular left hand to make a T, great way to call a timeout by Michigan.

Mookie said...
Nov 17, 2007, 1:09:00 PM  

This game is stale.

Mookie said...
Nov 17, 2007, 1:15:00 PM  

Kirk is acting like a 9 year old.

Mookie said...
Nov 17, 2007, 1:17:00 PM  

"Rain continues to come down" - Brent Musberger

Since when does rain come up?

Mookie said...
Nov 17, 2007, 1:17:00 PM  

It's a hard hitting game, but it's not nasty" - Kirk Herbstreit

Mookie said...
Nov 17, 2007, 1:19:00 PM  

"He'll be on the pole tomorrow" Brent talking about Jimmie Johnson.............ewwwww.

Mookie said...
Nov 17, 2007, 1:21:00 PM  

NASCAR, NASCAR, NASCAR, NASCAR, NASCAR, NASCAR, NASCAR

FYI- We're actually live-blogging this race tomorrow. Well not me...Dummy. Stop by if you enjoy Left Turns.

Nov 17, 2007, 1:21:00 PM  

Michigan's punter is going to be the MVP of this game.

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 1:24:00 PM  

A little off topic here, CBS listed their announcing schedule for Thanksgiving.

WEEK 12 -- Nov. 22 (Thanksgiving Day)

GAME -- PLAY-BY-PLAY/ANALYST -- PRODUCER/DIRECTOR

4:00 PM, ET starts:

·N.Y. Jets @ Dallas* -- Jim Nantz/Phil Simms -- Lance Barrow/Mike Arnold

WEEK 12 -- Nov. 25 -- DOUBLEHEADER

GAME -- PLAY-BY-PLAY/ANALYST -- PRODUCER/DIRECTOR

1:00 PM, ET starts:

·Tennessee @ Cincinnati -- Bill Macatee/Steve Beuerlein -- Ross Schneiderman/Andy Goldberg
·Houston @ Cleveland -- Gus Johnson/Steve Tasker -- Victor Frank/Chris Svendsen
·Buffalo @ Jacksonville -- Kevin Harlan/Rich Gannon -- Jim Rikhoff/Bryan Lilley
·Oakland @ Kansas City -- Ian Eagle/Solomon Wilcots -- Bob Dekas/Cathy Barreto

4:15 PM, ET starts:

·Baltimore @ San Diego -- Dick Enberg/Randy Cross -- Bob Mansbach/Suzanne Smith
·Denver @ Chicago -- Greg Gumbel/Dan Dierdorf -- Mark Wolff/Bob Fishman

Mookie said...
Nov 17, 2007, 1:24:00 PM  

I saw that Mook....How many Jets games have Nantz and Simms done this year? 4???

Nov 17, 2007, 1:27:00 PM  

Nantz is to the AFC East as Buck is to the NFC East.

Mookie said...
Nov 17, 2007, 1:29:00 PM  

Wooooooooo!

Nov 17, 2007, 1:36:00 PM  

haha...great kick...umm yeah a little short...

Wow Lisa sure has a lot of emotion

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 1:41:00 PM  

how many times in the SECOND half will we hear Herbie say that Hart & Henne came back just for this game?
good god is that the only thing he has today?

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 2:00:00 PM  

please tell me someone who has DVR got that picture of the middle finger just to the right of that guy with with michigan beanie.

Kyle said...
Nov 17, 2007, 2:08:00 PM  

Got it Kyle...too funny.

Nov 17, 2007, 2:13:00 PM  

Thanks, love you.

Also, chalk up another Boom...

Kyle said...
Nov 17, 2007, 2:17:00 PM  

Ditto...just a photo okay?

Nov 17, 2007, 2:21:00 PM  

The photo should say it all. The angst one the bird flipper's face is incredible. I can't watch other games because I keep going back to see it every comercial break. Also, the blonde girl with her palms to the sky was classic misery as well.

Kyle said...
Nov 17, 2007, 2:26:00 PM  

Such is life these days as a Michigan fan.

Nov 17, 2007, 2:29:00 PM  

I'd like to be upset that they're just now playing Mallett, but Henne and Hart deserved a shot at the win.

Henne, Hart, and Carr can all now ride off into the sunset and they can move on.

Nov 17, 2007, 2:32:00 PM  

I just like watching other people suffer. I'm one of those people now, too, as I am rooting for Big Blue. Fuck the sweater-vest. But my game starts at 7, so i'm not suffering that much. *boomer sooner ;-)*

Kyle said...
Nov 17, 2007, 2:33:00 PM  

Put your 4s up.

Nov 17, 2007, 2:37:00 PM  

The Ohio State Mehigan game is really boring. It's actually got me looking forward to Duke-Notre Dame.

Also,
K-state and Missouri is a really good game.

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 2:37:00 PM  

It's a good game, but really shitty coaching via Kstate. You have a 6-5, 250 lb QB and you don't go for it on 4th and short twice in within the 5 and you kick a field goal. That's like not handing off to Jovorskie Lane in that situation, which is why Coach Fran is a retard.

Kyle said...
Nov 17, 2007, 2:40:00 PM  

It is pretty boring if you're not a fan of either team. I'm trying to switch around, but I keep staying on ABC.

Nov 17, 2007, 2:44:00 PM  

Henne is seriously ruining any pro shot he would have. Just dumb. I know he's not going to be great, but he's going to be drafted.

Nov 17, 2007, 2:47:00 PM  

Does "Minor" translate to "fumble" in some language?

Kyle said...
Nov 17, 2007, 2:47:00 PM  

Well...would have been drafted.

Nov 17, 2007, 2:48:00 PM  

I'm calling it for Ohio State right now. Lloyd Carr will announce his retirment after the game. And...in a shocking development, admit to taking estrogen for his sex change operation in three months.

Don said...
Nov 17, 2007, 3:05:00 PM  

I suspect Tressel perfers Michigan's offense on the field over his own. I would too.

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 3:13:00 PM  

Ole Miss-LSU game just saw a DB get planted on a block. Made my dick move.

Kyle said...
Nov 17, 2007, 4:50:00 PM  

Does Gary Danielson even know what he is talking about. Twice Ole Miss has called a timeout because the play clock has run out and both times he claimed it was because they disliked the play.

And he also said a pass was incomplete because a player had his knee down.

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 5:08:00 PM  

Don't know who the color guy on the Va Tech Miami game is, but he just said "Glennon threaded the needle with that pass. He literally threaded the needle." Really? Literally? With thread and everything?

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 6:01:00 PM  

"Nice call by Offensive Coordinator Bryan Springsteen there." -Bill Curry...referencing VT OC Bryan Stienspring. Maybe he thought he was a boss?

Jonef said...
Nov 17, 2007, 6:10:00 PM  

"Johnson goes up the middle"- Dan Fouts for Cal/UW.

Mookie said...
Nov 17, 2007, 6:29:00 PM  

"Johnson has 40 yards" - Fouts....the horny bastard.

Mookie said...
Nov 17, 2007, 6:29:00 PM  

Go Bucks!

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 6:44:00 PM  

David Norrie in PSU/MSU... I don't know many Big Ten QB's who can hit these types of balls"

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 6:44:00 PM  

For AA...this will be the 2nd and 3rd Jets games for Nantz and Simms this year.

God, who knew the most important football game at Arrowhead Stadium this year would be...Mizzou/Kansas...

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 6:45:00 PM  

"Certainly a coming out party for Johnson"- Tim Brant

Mookie said...
Nov 17, 2007, 7:00:00 PM  

"Oklahoma stiffens when you get down in that red zone"

-the Ness

hollywood wags said...
Nov 17, 2007, 9:16:00 PM  

"He may be listed as offensive coordinator for Texas Tech, but saying Mike Leach has an offensive coordinator is like saying, I don't know, Rachael Ray has a private chef." - Nessler

She probably does, because her cooking sucks ass, but still, bad analogy.

Signal to Noise said...
Nov 17, 2007, 9:36:00 PM  

bobby knight in the booth in the 3rd Q

hollywood wags said...
Nov 17, 2007, 10:02:00 PM  

Bonnie botched the interview with Bob

hollywood wags said...
Nov 17, 2007, 10:06:00 PM  

Good Lord, more Mitch Albom.

hollywood wags said...
Nov 17, 2007, 10:21:00 PM  

"If Clemson does not get sacked, they win that game on the field goal" - Bob Davie in the BC/Clemson game

Final score:

BC 20 Clemson 17

Bob.....the 5 point field goal doesn't exist.

Mookie said...
Nov 17, 2007, 11:31:00 PM  

"And as far as Matt Ryan goes, Clemson was playing checkers, but Matt Ryan was playing chess, checkmate." Bob Davie.

If you say so Bob.

Anonymous said...
Nov 17, 2007, 11:32:00 PM  

The ESPN Sign Police missed one really good sign:

http://footballjesus.wordpress.com/2007/11/18/best-signs-at-espn-college-gameday-ann-arbor/

Johnny Miller said...
Nov 18, 2007, 4:18:00 PM  

"This is a pass play when you call it in the huddle and how it chains........ges. Is like this." -Gary Danielson

By far my favorite. I heard it live and had to say it outloud like 10 times before I stopped laughing at how bad it was. He paused for a good 5 or 6 seconds. Classic.

Chase said...
Nov 19, 2007, 2:15:00 AM  

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