I Once Cheated On A Test Because I Wanted To Get Kicked Out Of A Class I Hated

Saturday, August 11, 2007

(posted by OMDQ)

Earlier this afternoon, John Fricke, Rob Dibble and (I think) Chris Landry were on "Fox GameTime Saturday", talking about Sergio Garcia's disqualification from the PGA Championship on Saturday for signing an incorrect scorecard. They reported the news and cracked a few jokes, nothing out of the ordinary...then Fricke said something that caught my attention:

(Note: this is heavily paraphrased. I wasn't smart enough to grab a piece of paper and write it down. Besides, I was driving. Police frown on note-taking while operating a motor vehicle. Anyway, I think I got the spirit of the remark.)

"Sometimes, if a guy isn't playing well and doesn't want to play, he'll sign an incorrect card on purpose so he gets disqualified."

Um, what?

I'm probably not as knowledgeable about golf as Fricke is, but this just seems like a ludicrous proposal that was pulled out of thin air because it was Garcia who made the mistake. If he doesn't want to be there, if he's disappointed at barely making the cut, shooting a 4-over third round, and sitting at 9-over after three days, why not just quit? The reaction will be negative in any case - if he quits, he's a gutless loser who can't deal with adversity. If he signs the wrong card, he's a moron who can't count (although I suppose he could see how much blame could be shifted onto Boo Weekley, who was marking Garcia's scores and made the actual mistake). Lose-Lose, kids.

You know the scene from "The Rock" where the bad guys launch a rocket filled with poison gas at Oakland, then Ed Harris changes the coordinates so it crashes into the bay? When the other bad guys figure out what he did and David Morse notes that the good guys don't know they missed on purpose, one of them says, "Great. We're not gutless, we're incompetent." That's the choice in a situation like that. Gutless, incompetent, or stick it out for one more day.

Fricke gets bonus points for noting that the rule calling for a disqualification in the event of an incorrectly signed scorecard is somewhat silly (why not issue a severe stroke penalty?). Unfortunately, he gave them back after Landry noted that, "Those are the rules...you sign an incorrect scorecard, you get disqualified," prompting Fricke to deliver the worst comparison I have ever heard (again, paraphrased - I was trying not to run over a kid on a bike at this point):
"Would they have done that to the Indianapolis Colts in the Super Bowl - oh, sorry, you signed your scorecard wrong, Chicago is the champion."

I'm not sure I can even respond to that. Obviously, he knows that football teams don't use scorecards. But don't be in such a hurry to draw comparisons that the words come out sounding all stupid and stuff. I know you're on the radio, I know you have to think on your feet, and I know that since you have a national gig, you must be reasonably good at this - so next time, take five seconds and come up with something logical.

Posted by One More Dying Quail at 3:46 PM

2 Comments:

its like days of thunder. garcia just over-reved the engine so he had an excuse to get out of the tournament.

quiet said...
Aug 11, 2007, 6:23:00 PM  

I once cheated on my girlfriend 'cause the other chick was hotter.

Dummy said...
Aug 11, 2007, 6:43:00 PM  

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